families and funerals

Yesterday, my family went to a funeral. Two of my children had the privilege and honor of singing at it. Over the years, my family has been to many funerals. Sometimes, they have been the funerals of people we knew well and, almost always, they have been the funerals of people we wish we had known better. Today, I was reminded of the fact that even when we think we know a person, we often only know the small, little section of their life that they have shown us. If we have only known a person for a short amount of their life, all we know of them is the person that they were during those years. Today, as I watched a slideshow on a screen of my friend's life, I saw glimpses into the years before I knew him. It made me think to myself, I wish I had taken the time to look at all of his pictures before he passed away and listen to stories of his younger years. I never even thought of what he was like as a young man, but I should have. I should have been a better listener. I realize now that people look at me the same way. They only know the small portion of my life that I have shown them. If I met you when I was a child, I was full of adventure and you may have called me Pammy. If I met you as a teenager, you would have thought of me as bubbly and fun loving-always singing, always looking for ways to be in the center of what God was doing. If you met me in college, you would again know me as a singer, but also as a listener and an advisor. As a young wife and mother, I was simply in love with my husband and my children and joy flowed forth from me. As I got older, life became much more difficult and that bubbly personality moved out of the way in order to allow a grown up in. I still can't really remember when it happened, but I definitely did grow up. My parents and sisters are the only ones that watched that whole transformation cause they are the only ones who have known me all my life.  Even John, my husband, has only know me for the last 29 years of my life.  Mostly, people have only seen the stage of my life that was in view when I knew them best. It has always seemed strange to me that the people that know me now, in our present home, only know me as a 50-ish older woman with a big, loud, busy family. They never knew me when I was cute and young and singing all over the world. They never knew me when I  had eighties hair and no wrinkles and fit into cute, trendy clothes. They never knew me when I first got married and lived in Spring, or a few years later as a young mom with four children under the age of 6 in Sweeny. They never knew me as I was having all of my children. Some of them first met me after all seven children were here.  They only see who I am right now and, of course, I only see who they are right now. I wish we could all take better, longer, more detailed looks into each other's lives while we are still alive. After a funeral, it's a little late to wish we had spent more time with someone in order to know them better. Yesterday was a blessing as we celebrated someone's life...Lord, I pray that I will begin to take the time to celebrate and enjoy the lives of the people who cross my path each and every day.